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Journal Stolen From: [link]

Well, looking through my gallery, a lot of my art isn't very good. It lacks a lot of what used to make it good like, originality, and personality.
But for this new year, I will try to make it better.
It's been leaning more towards uhm, I guess you could call it fashion, because fashion has always interested me. And I think I might continue down that road, but try to improve at the same time.
So, lets see what happens!

Happy New Year peoples, and I send you my best wishes.

PS: How did everybody's new years go?

You know how when you're doing something, and you enjoy what you're doing, you just smile to yourself? Half the time you don't even notice that you're doing it but you later realize that you've got a little smile on your face.

Well, I just got that feeling for the first time in like ... 3-4 years?

I'm really hoping that this is a sign of things to come.
And I know I should probably get some sleep because I have an interview tomorrow, but I really really just... I dunno.

I don't feel like sleeping.

I really hope I get this job though. Please leave me some messages of encouragement.

If I don't get this job I'm pretty sure that everything will just go back to how it was, and ... I'll feel like I'm not worth anything again.

*sigh*

Well, since I haven't been updating my journal OR my deviations I decided to give you all a taste of what I do when I sleep at night. Just because ... I haven't got anything else interesting to say. For an example today, I'm going to use the dreams I dreamed between 7:30 AM and 11:30 AM this morning. How do I know it was between those times? Because Warren woke me up at 7, I fell back asleep at 7:30, had the dreams, and then woke up at 11:30. Good enough? Alright, here we gooo!
So the dreams start off with me in a field with my friend Ken. I have no idea how we got here, we're just, you know, frolicking around. Ken finds a snake and he throws at me. And it's not moving around much so you know, no harm, it's probably dead anyways. Although you could probably get some pretty bad diseases from that but, come on, it's a dream world. Leave me alone.
Anyways, he tosses the snake towards me, AKA away from him and I just end up kicking it away from me. Now to note, in real life I would never do this. I would probably pick it up cause it WAS squirming a little, and I would hold it, and I would cuddle it and I would call him Squishy and he would be my Squishy..
Anyways, I guess it's a good thing I DIDN'T pick him up and hug him and call him my Squishy because he rolled over ... er ... well, wiggled his way into an upwards position and turned out to be what looked like a mini cobra snake! Oh no! So I call out to Ken, "Hey, watch out! The snake's poisonous!" Knowing Ken he was probably all "Oh I know. Blahblahblah" but in my dream he didn't talk. No sexual comments either haha. But it wouldn't have mattered anyways, he had nothing to worry about. I attempted to maneuver the snake onto the tip of my shoe so I could drop kick it far far away and the damn bastard bit me on the ankle. Yeah, I know, I'm intelligent, dur hur. Well, I fell down, immense pain blah blah blah, but you know in dreams, the pain is always kind of muted so no worries, yo. Anyways, I fall down and already my senses are kind of blurred and I'm going in and out of conciousness and the bastard somehow finds his way onto my chest and he bites me on the chin! Right, if you want a job done right, DO IT YOURSELF. Well I'm all worrying "Oh no, this is closer to my brain, am I going to die quicker?" Well, it wouldn't have mattered anyways because he bit me on the temple next. How thorough of him. Well, I pass out, but I'm completely aware there are things going on. What? Yeah. I know I'm screaming a lot, well in my head, I don't know if I'm doing it out loud. But dang, I just keep screaming and screaming. Man am I a wuss. And there's people like pulling and tugging and I don't know what they're doing around my legs but they're doing something alright. Well, I wake up, and I'm in a hospital. Yay, I was saved! And Ken was there, and he was all worried asking if I was okay, and I'm all, "Sure thing, dude." And Warren's there and he just wants to cuddle. I don't think he even knew I was dying. *Shrug* Oh well, I am just sitting in the bed thinking man, can't wait to show this to my CAMP ROOMMATES! Wait, what? I go to camp?
Fade out of this dream, go onto this next. I'm heading back to my little house which is part of a huge camp I guess. Funny, thing it just looks like a little street with some houses on it. They're all white too. Well in this short snippet of a dream, I look in the mirror, I've got stitches like, everywhere. Stitches? For snake bites? There's nothing on my chin, I've got stitches below my temple, and on my temple all you see is like, two little fang bites.
They didn't do too good a job patching up, did they? They completely missed the wound! Well, I tell my roommates, and they don't give a fuck. Haha, seems like the kind of people I would hang out with.
Insert between these two dreams, a really weird dream I don't want to talk about where, I'm in a community bathroom and my lady bits get made fun of. Yay!
Well, fade out of this dream, ONTO THE NEXT! What was the point of that last one? I have no clue. And even though in all these dreams I am in completely different areas with some completely different people, they are all interconnected to make NO SENSE AT ALL.
Well, in THIS dream, I am in a little bus, that has walls like a mobile home. And me and a couple of my friends, we're going to go do some DANGEROUS STUFF. Yep, we get out, and we go up to this shady looking guy. There's like me, a guy, I don't know what he looks like because he's not important, there's a black girl who I kind of hang out next to the whole time, and there's a black haired girl. Well the black haired girl goes up to this shady looking guy while me and the rest of the people hang back, and she's exchanging some sort of GERBIL FOOD. How ... unpredictable a situation? Well, he takes out a huge thing of gerbil food, fresh, you can tell by the look of it, and she takes out a little dinky container. Although in retrospect that is a MASSIVE gerbil food container. If you put it on the side of a gerbil cage, the gerbil cage would tip over in comparison of weight ratios there. Or whatever. So she dumps it out, and I can see it wasn't even empty, and I think in my head, "What a waste. The gerbil totally would have eaten that." The funny thing about the gerbil food container is that it looked like a water container. I have no idea how the gerbil ate it.. But anyways, things are going fine, we all go to leave, and she's all "I'll take care of the rest of it." Well, we walk out into the hallway and all of a sudden she starts like screaming real loud "Get your hands away from me! GET YOUR FINGER OUT OF THERE!" And I can only guess what's going on so I go into heroic mode. "We must go back! We have to save her, he is a dirty man!" And the rest of them of course are all, "But - " And I'm all,"NO MAN LEFT BEHIND!!!" Well we rush back and her and the man are WRESTLING FOR THEIR LIVES. SHIT. Well, I grab a bucket I run up and I smack him on the back of the head. OoO BOLD! Well we all turn and start running for the exit, and you know somehow, the bucket he has in his hand turns into a BUCKET MACHINE GUN. WTF. He starts shooting and while I'm somehow protecting us from the gunfire with my little bucket, the black girl has a BUCKET MACHINE GUN of her own and she starts shooting back! Well, way to take charge! He falls behind, and the black girl says, "Well, at least we managed to protect the rest of us from being sexually harassed. And I say, "Haha, you're a couple years too late." You know, in reference to myself. Even in my dreams I can be a snarky bitch. Score. Well we get to our magical trailer bus and it's somehow turned out to be a bunch of barrels full of some sort of I think flammable liquid that looks like water being pulled by a horse and carriage. Yeah, wow. Well I'm doing the whole "You go on ahead, I'll catch up!" hero thing, and they ... get into the barrels? and start to run away because the shady looking guy caught up. I JUMP on top of the barrels and we ride away. Thankfully, even though it's leaking fluids heavily, the barrels somehow do not blow up or even like ... crush into themselves, my friends get away in the barrels without drowning [somehow?] and I make it away safely on top of our little barrel horse and carriage. Hurrah.
Onto the next dream, I've still got the snake bites but I'm at a Halloween party! Sort of? I'm wearing a dress and I'm with a couple friends who are making fun of me because I didn't put it on right. It's a halter top, but the top is tied so tightly that my boobs are just kind of squished together and the fabric is all bunched up and it just looks retarded. But I just laugh it off "Haha, I meant to look like a douche, haha you caught me!" Well, a couple of teachers walk by, [Didn't I graduate like 3 years ago? Yes...] and one of them is dressed like a zombie with a giant like foam made head. Well, she's looking at me [I know she's a she, don't ask why, I just DO. Yes, I can tell your sex through your GIANT FOAM HEAD.] and she gets this glazed look in her eye like she wants to EAT ME FOR BREAKFAST. And I think "Oh great, not again." Well thankfully this dream is not about zombies. But the dream plays that bit of her walking by and getting hungry over and over again for a minute, just so I get the idea, that yes, I am and always will be surrounded by the thought of zombies. Fuckin' A. Well I turn around and suddenly I have a movie star moment where I catch the eye of the studly employee in the giant fast food kitchen behind us. [Where the fuck did that kitchen come from?] Yes I, Jamie, have caught his eye even though, he didn't look at me ONCE. Well, pan over into his view, and me, well I'm some blonde girl dressed like Marilyn Monroe on a hawai'ian vacation and him and me are trying to convince the teacher to let us into the party. We're in a white hallway with like no windows or anything and we're talking through a closed door, but somehow I can see the teacher and what she's saying back. What? Well, she finally agrees and me and the dude swim through. "Wait," you say, "Swim through?" And I say, "Yes, swim through!" Because you see, somehow we had ended up on the roof, but not on the roof, no, we are swimming over the roof. And I get worried cause I can't hold my breath that long, but we swim over the roof, down and out of a doorway. What? We were INSIDE the entire time we were swimming over that roof? Yes, yes we were. But no, we weren’t! Because after we swim out of the doorway we are outside again [of course] but we are still in the sky! I am SO CONFUSED. Well, we swim over a little ways and go to land in the waist deep water that the party is being had in. [Uh, what? If we’re swimming, how can we be landing in water? Well, you got me!] Anyways, we go to land, and the man, he lands ever so gently in nice waist deep water, all unharmed and stuff, while I manage to land in elbow deep water while falling really hard from the sky. I bruise EVERYTHING, but I get up laughing cause, haha, only me. And then the dream ends because I wake up. Damn, it was just getting interesting.
Well, there’s my dreams for you. Not only is real life bad enough but in my dreams I get bitten by a snake, shot at by a machine BUCKET, get made fun of for my lady bits, get hungered after by a FAKE ZOMBIE, fall out of the sky and land in the only shallow water ANYWHERE, and in the end I still don’t get to make out with the dude because I was too busy doing other things in my 4 hours allotted sleeping time. WTF, mate?

I didn't know just sketches could get attention too. I always feel like I have to finish every bit of artwork, but I'm really glad for all the positivity I've received during my last couple uploads. Maybe things will start picking up ^_^